It’s Misha I still remember you all.

Hhrrru? 😻

It’s me Misha. Guys I’m sorry I haven’t posted anything for soooooo long, life sucks sometimes and you can’t do what you want.

How are you all peeps and pets doing?

I wanted to thank you so so much for all your thoughts and that you cared so much about me when I got sick, thanks for all your good thoughts and prayers and nice words. I’m much better now. Still a bit sluggish but much much better.

I actually don’t have much to say because Mila told you about almost everything already, that I now have a new friend Sasha and that I couldn’t write anything last month because Mila sent her laptop to some guy to fix it. I thought she lent it to him at first and was cross with her for doing it because I couldn’t write to you, I couldn’t watch cats and birds and other things I used to sometimes. And I was cross with that silly guy why he doesn’t return it to us for so long it’s not fair and I saw that Mila was pissed at him too. But then she explained to me that she sent it so that he could fix it.

And then when it finally came back Mum and Mila went out very late in the evening and they came back with Sasha.

I was so mad at him and at them to do this! I thought they don’t like me anymore. I thought they wanted to show me I’m not important anymore because I’m bigger than Sasha and they’re bored with me. Mila tried to snuggle me and Mum wanted to give me my favourite sauce but I thought they were doing it to make fun of me and I was so very mad.

But I was even more mad with Sasha. Everyone was talking about him and comparing him to me and how he is better because his fur is softer and more shiny than mine was when I came here, and because he’s more fluffy than I was at his age, and he purrs louder and is so very cuddly and I’m not. But I purr for myself, not for others, to soothe myself when I’m stressed, and not to please silly peeps. They can purr for themselves if they like to hear it, and not ask me to purr. How stupid is that!

And I was cross with Mum because when I growled and hissed at Sasha she thought I’ll do something very bad to him like scratch him badly or maybe even kill him. Well, I might hate someone but I’mm not freaky enough to kill him right away just because I hate him.

Now I got used to Sasha more and I know that my peeps just wanted me to have a friend, and I know that Sasha likes me and everyone likes me too. But it still feels so strange to have another cat in the house, and I can’t get used to it. I think I’m afraid of Sasha. I’m almost always afraid of something. And almost always stressed. And now as he is with us I’m frightened ALL the time.

When Sasha comes to me and hhrrrus and purrs at me I know he likes me but I am afraid, I don’t want to be to close to him and I run away. But I like him too. It’s awful but I can’t help it. And with peeps, it’s always been just the same. Or similar. But my peeps are more clever than Sasha and they understand it, and Sasha is little and silly and he doesn’t understand anything. I think he thinks I don’t like him – well that sounds very complicated, doesn’t it? – and I feel like a very bad awful Misha for it. Maybe he also thinks I’m bad. Well, maybe not… if he still likes me, he probably doesn’t think so. Mum constantly tells me to relax, but I can’t relax whenever I want. Only when everything is calm and good and like I want it to be.

But I try to take care of Sasha and I like to play with him. We often talk together and the peeps really like it, especially Mila, because she thinks it sounds funny when we talk. I tell him how things are in our house and what is where etc. and sometimes when I’m less scared I lick him, and sometimes I let him lie on me and we sleep together. But I don’t like when people see it all. And I don’t like when for example Sasha lies in my cartonboard or in my basket, because it’s mine! I never lie in his, so why can he lie in mine? My things should smell like me, not like someone else, isn’t that logical? Sometimes when I’m asleep Zofijka brings Sasha to me and I hate it and go nuts!

Sasha is very silly. He doesn’t know that you should poop and pee in the loo. Actually I think he does, but he doesn’t care. Sometimes he does it in the loo, but most times anywhere else and mum is very angry at him. But he still doesn’t get it. Today Mum closed him in the loo so that he would learn and understand where to poop and pee, but I don’t think he knows why she closed him. He found a little glass ball I lost there months ago and no one could find it, and he was playing it and running around the restroom like crazy hahahaha silly guy. Sometimes he poops to the bathtube hahaha. And last night he peed in Mila’s bed, and today on Mum’s. Mum says that if he won’t learn very soon where to do it she’ll get rid of him. I don’t know if it would be good or bad and if I’d like it, but I don’t think she’ll do that. And he is always so cheerful and foolish that I think he wouldn’t care at all. If she would throw him out of the house he’d just stand by the door and purr and poop right where he’d stand. He always purrs, even when they yell at him. My human mum often says I’m a nutter or freaky or that I am afraid of my own shadow, but I wonder if Sasha isn’t a bigger nutter, because which normal cat would purr and sigh with happiness when they yell at him and throw him into the restroom. I think he’s in his own world all the time and there are only nice things in there, so he doesn’t know that anything bad could actually exist and doesn’t think that it really matters where you poop. What do you think?

I was vaccinated on Monday. It was awful. I didn’t cry though. I was vaccinated for the same thing that Sasha’s sick with now and the peeps say it was wrong. I don’t know why it was wrong, because if vaccines are to help you to not be sick, I think it was just the right thing to give it to me when Sasha was sick. But it turned out to not be good and as you know I got sick, and I am sicker than Sasha and everyone talks about me.

I puked and choked and was cold all the time, I’m still cold but not as much. My muscles were aching, so shaky I was and they were constantly strained. But it’s weird I have the same thing as Sasha if Sasha doesn’t feell like me – he’s sneezing and his eyes are watery and he is hoarse and has runny nose.

Mum and Zofijka took me to the vet very quickly but the vet, not that lady who vaccinated me, the other one, because it was late. She told them she doesn’t know what’s wrong with me and then got out the needle and started to prickle me and it hurt so badly. I usually don’t cry when it hurts but then I did and I was bouncing around and was “aggressive” and “naughty” and they couldn’t calm me down and Zofijka cried and I scratched her. I don’t know why she cried – because I was sick and cried or because I scratched her and it hurt? I didn’t want to scratch her, but I didn’t think. They couldn’t hold me and I broke the needle and she didn’t give me any injections. She gave me very big pills and other ones that were small but very icky and bitter. Luckily I didn’t have to take those big ones finally, I think I’d choke to death.

When we came home I curled up under Mila’s bed and was very shaky I even couldn’t walk properly and was slipping.

I didn’t feel any better yesterday morning so they took me again to the vet and I was scared and very weak. It was a guy. He gave me two injections and it didn’t hurt, only a little, but I didn’t cry. But I think that even if it hurt more I would gave up because I was to weak. He told me I don’t have to take those big pills, only those small yucky ones for diarrhea, and that I have the same sickness as Sasha but I am weaker and always afraid of something so my body has it harder to get rid of the sickness so that’s why I am sicker. That’s odd, isn’t it? If someone is constantly stressed out, like me, shouldn’t he be saved and not be sick at all, instead of being even sicker and even more stressed? Life isn’t fair. He also gave Mum some pink pills that I have to take now to be less scared and get used to Sasha.

And I am much better now. But I’mstill very stressed. I always am.

Mishpurrs and mishhugs for all of you pets and peeps. 🤗

Misha Pisha Shmisha

Update on Misha and me.

First of all I wanted to thank all of you once again for all the support and kind thoughts for Misha. It’s way more appreciated than I can express at the moment and means a lot for us. 💙
So as you may know from my yesterday post Misha is sick and that’s for sure now.
I went to sleep almost straight away after writing this post though couldn’t fall asleep for ages, had that awful feeling when you’re just too exhausted emotionally and physically to actually fall asleep. Misha spent some part of the night under my bed, then he threw up again, which messed up with my absolutely fabulously overactive emetophobic brain even more and I felt so sorry for him as he looked so scared and devastated and I was just helpless and scared as well, maybe more than him. 😀 Poor child. So I finally gave up and had to take my sleep meds which I always try to avoid as much as possible but sometimes they can be really saving.
Before I fell asleep Sasha came to me and laid down on me purring so blissfully and loudly, even without me stroking him. He is really such a nice little furball, so very cuddly and joyous. As he lied on me, I felt more grounded and calm under his little, warm body and finally we both fell asleep, although I can’t say I was sleeping well because I was waking like every two hours or so which was really irritating.
Mum gave Misha the antibiotic in the morning, the one he was prescribed yesterday, but he was looking very very poorly. He didn’t eat anything, only drank some water, had diarrhea and fever, although he felt very cold and was shivering just like yesterday. He laid down in his bed – the basket on my bed – and lied there so silently, literally the only way you could actually see he’s alive is to feel his chest moving while breathing, other than that he was so still that it felt utterly scary to me and Zofijka and even to Mum, although she says she isn’t emotionally attached to Misha.
So finally we decided we should go to our local vet to check on him, maybe he would know what’s wrong exactly.
Mum and Sofi ended up packing Misha and driving there twice because the first time they went it was closed so poor thing was quite stressed out, no wonder as he hardly ever leaves the house. Luckily though the vet was indeed able to tell us what’s wrong.
He was actually laughing openly at the thoughtlessness of the vet who vaccinated Misha for cat flu, knowing that Sasha is sick, the more that he was sick with just the same thing. Who on Earth would vaccinate their child if another one is contagiously sick, and why should it be otherwise with pets? That was just what we thought, but obviously you don’t want to come across as a know-all, after all the vet should know better what she does…
Actually, before Misha was vaccinated on Monday, my Mum had one of those inklings she has – the first time they told us to come with Misha for the vaccination and Mum went with him it turned out that they actually didn’t have the vaccine at the moment, then the second time they went was just the same, and my Mum started to wonder out of the blue that maybe it means Misha shouldn’t be vaccinated. Then they planned to go for the third time, but Mum had to collect Dad so they didn’t.
As I said my Mum has such inklings or impulses quite often, she really seems to have a good intuition. It might look a bit like some superstitiality or something like this, but she really acts as if she had some sixth sense sometimes, and generally she’s not superstitious at all, quite the opposite. Oh gosh what a long digression!
So our local vet to whom Misha went today laughed at that vet quite honestly, and told Mum that Misha most probably has caught cat flu from Sasha and this is its very beginning. But because Misha was also vaccinated, plus has been very stressed lately, and not coming out of the house much, it might be a bit more severe than Sasha’s, as his autoimmune system is probably weaker due to all that.
He gave Misha two injections with no problem – although the emergency vet to whom they went yesterday couldn’t manage to do it and Misha broke the needle – and he told Mum to come with Misha again on Saturday to see how things are going. So it’s probably much less serious than it looks.
Mum mentioned to him that Misha is so very stressed out lately and so very fearful, that he’s always been rather prone to anxiety, but since Sasha is with us he seems much more stressed, and he prescribed him something mildly sedative that he can take ad hoc when he’s more stressed, like at such times as now, when he has a lot to cope with emotionally. When I heard all that, I felt somewhat relieved and so did Zofijka and Mum.
I can’t say though that Misha is doing better. What’s for sure though, is that he’s not worse and he’s even eaten a little, so we’re very hopeful.
Sasha is so very caring of him. He’s really such a kind-hearted baby. I went to Misha about an hour ago to check how he’s doing and I found Sasha sitting by his side and purring. Misha was indifferent and rather not encouraging to make any closer relationships with him, but Sasha didn’t care. He really likes Misha. He always purrs and hhrrrus when he sees him, though Misha usually runs away. It’s not like Misha doesn’t like him – he’s not hostile or anything anymore – he just seems like he still needs time to adapt to the situation.
When it comes to me, as I said I feel significantly relieved after all those news and that Misha is relatively stable even if still poorly, though I feel like it hasn’t sunk in in my brain yet. I can’t say I’m feeling well emotionally today.
I’m kinda agitated all day and very anxious in general, don’t know if it’s actually about Misha or for no particular reason. I’m just feeling sort of wired and antsy and jittery and my thoughts are racing quicker than horses and I feel like all the sounds and smells and everything was way more intense than normally and sort of overwhelming, – that thing happens to me quite often but today it’s really pretty distracting – but at the same time I feel exhausted. I don’t even know how to exactly describe it. My anxiety is pretty bad but as I said I’m not really sure of the reason so the more it’s hard for me to get rid of it. I guess I just have to get through this and can’t do much about it at the moment. I rarely feel that way, I mean agitated and like I can’t sit still for too long, usually my anxiety doesn’t look that way, so it feels rather awkward and annoying and maybe there’s something deeper to it that I can’t figure out, but honestly I’m not quite in the mood for figuring out anything at the moment, don’t think it would be actually productive. I think I’ll try my luck and go to sleep, who knows maybe I’ll succeed. Sleep well too guys. 🙂