The Human Life Of Misha Hhrrru? ep. 8.

Hhrrru? ๐Ÿ˜ป

Yay! Finally I’ve got to write another post. How are you all pets and peeps doing? Here’s another episode of my what-if human life. *****

March 9

I am Misha. I am 8. I just came back from school today. It was mostly a very boring day but the last lesson we had was plast plast –
that is how I call art. – I love plast plast! My Mum does it, and my plast plast teacher used to go to college with her, but she’s not very nice to me because my mum is her friend. It’s the opposite. She is very demanding. She wants more from me than all the other kids. When any other kid does something a bit wrong she says it’s okay as it is, but when I do even a very little mistake, she is very worried and wants me to try more. I used to be a bit sad about it and think I’m so very bad at plast plast, and I didn’t want to be bad at plast plast because I love it and my family always tells me I am a very good painter, but mum told me she does it because she wants me to develop my talent. I guess it’s very nice of her. I want to be a very good painter and now I’m happy when she tells me that something is wrong. But at the same time, she’s hardly ever satisfied. She constantly wants me to improve something and even mum says she’s a bit too harsh on me because I am just a little child. But guess what? Today she was very happy with me.

She wanted us to draw or paint or present in any possible way that suits us, our favourite season. My favourite season is autumn, because I love leaves. I like to think about them. But it makes me sad when I think about lonely leaves. When one fallen leaf is lying alone, or among leaves of a different kind, with no leaf of its own kind, or if there is only one leaf on a twig or the whole tree, it makes me so very sad. When I feel lonely, I often think that I feel like a lonely leaf. Some people say it’s stupid because leaves are never lonely, but I think they can be, very often. Whenever it’s autumn and leaves are falling and I come back from school, I try not to step on them. My mum says I’m too sensitive about leaves and that they have no feelings. But I just love them! I’ve always had. It makes me sad when someone says they don’t feel anything, I’m sure they do. But mum thinks I have such strange thoughts and ideas because I’m the only child and have no one to play with. But I have Feluล›, and when I don’t have Feluล› I have myself to play with. And even if I had many siblings and many friends, which would be very lovely, I guess I still would be myself, wouldn’t I? With my own thoughts and ideas. I would still have enough place in my heart to love leaves and care for them. And when it’s getting cold, I sometimes take a couple leaves home with me and put them close to my bed, so that they are warm and cosy and they have me and I have them. Mum says it’s unhygienic. But how can something as natural as leaves be unhygienic? Perhaps I’ll have to make a bath for them when I take them home next year before I put them in my bedroom. I wonder how they would feel about that. But I wanted to talk about plast plast. So of course I decided I will paint an autumn picture. An autumn forest with colourful trees and with lots of leaves, but no lonely leaves because I didn’t want to feel sad. I miss leaves because there are none at this time of year. They were all happy and with their leaf families, and leaves on the trees were happy too. i even managed to paint the wind moving the leaves, and light rain was falling. I painted birds and some other small animals, and a little grey cat rolling around among the leaves. I was so engrossed in this that I didn’t know what was going on around me and suddenly I felt someone elbowing me. It was Feluล›, he sits with me in class. “Hey, you, Misha, I’m speaking to you.” – he whispered. – “Hmmm what?” – I asked, looking up from my picture at him reluctantly. “I asked why do you painted a cat in this forest. Cats don’t live in the forest”. “This one does.” “Ahaa, and of course this cat is called Misha?” – he asked giggling. – I have a book series about a cat called Misha, and I myself often feel like I’d love to be a cat, and I often include a cat called Misha in my paintings. Feluล› thinks it’s weird, and that I am weird, but he likes me anyway. I nodded, and got back to my picture. I finished it, and had a lot of time to wait for all the others to finish. Finally the teacher said the time has passed and that she’d now like to see our works. She came to me and Feluล› in the end, and seeing my picture, she gasped.
“Oh, Misha! This is beautiful! Very simple, but you really have a knack for colour, I must admit that. There’s still a long way for you to go but I can say it now in front of the whole class that you are very talented and you need to develop it. But, why did you paint a cat here?” “It’s a cat called Misha.” “Ah, well, I assume this explains everything” – she laughed. – She didn’t understand and pretended she did, I don’t like it, but other than that I was sooooo very happy that she praised me. I got an A for this painting. I’m home now. My mum is abroad for a couple of days and grandma is here. She cooks us meals and all. It’s grandma from dad’s side, who lives nearby, not the one who gave me the books about Misha the cat. I’d prefer that grandma to come here and take care of me. This grandma is always irritated and grumpy and complains about everything and forces me to eat things I don’t like and is always asking what I’m doing and whether I did my homework, as if I never did, and when she’s not watching me she’s constantly watching very strange series on the telly. I’m not a baby, she doesn’t have to remind me of my school work. Today we had mushroom soup and liver for dinner, yuck! I guess grandma can cook better than mum, because mum often swears while cooking, cuts her fingers and does lots of strange unnecessary things and is always in a hurry, when she makes cereal for me she boils milk over most days so I’m late for school because she has to boil it twice or doesn’t remember to take out the cake in time from the oven, and grandma knows what she’s doing or at least she looks like she does, but at least mum doesn’t force me to eat what I don’t like, and grandma doesn’t even let me eat cereal. I had to eat scrambled eggs today for breakfast and I hate them. But actually I don’t like a lot of foods. I don’t even like bread, I never did. And grandma says it’s because I’m spoiled and don’t respect what other people do for me. No, I don’t if they do something I don’t like when they know I don’t like it, it’s malicious. But I actually haven’t done my homework today yet, so I better get to it now. Misha ๐Ÿ’œ ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’š

Misha: Zofijka’s got an idea.

Hhrrru? :3
How are you pets and peeps doing? Have you had anything very yummy to eat this week? Some great adventures? Let me know!
I wanted to write about an idea that Zofijka had recently and ask if you like it.
So, you know that I have a brain connection with Mila? Like, I can connect my brain to hers and then I can type (she doesn’t let me to type on her keyboard Mishself because I once blocked it hehehe) and do all sorts of things that humans do via her, sort of remotely, especially when we are with Zofijka. Mila often tells me what I should tell Zofijka because Zofijka listens to me more than to her and she likes to ask me about things or tell me what she was doing at school – lots of boring things but people usually bore me to death with their lives so I’ve kinda gotten used to it and can even pretend I’m incredibly intrigued and at the same time think what I’ll have for supper. – I can also connect to Zofijka but she doesn’t like it so I only do that when I want to do some artsy things like drawing, but she hardly ever lets me anyway. – When I’m connected to someone, I have the access to their brain world and we can exchange information and it’s very fun but a bit complicated, I don’t think any other pets even use such innovative technology. I usually talk to Zofijka in the evenings when she’s in bed and when she’s going to sleep either me or Mila tell her a story. Mila tells her about Jim – that dude in Australia that I think she has written about, who doesn’t need to eat and lives on helping everyone in the world – and I tell her very short stories about what my life would be like if I was a human. Every day I tell her about one day in my life, one per year. I always start it “I am Misha I am… years old” and I tell her about one day in each year of my fictional human life.
And earlier this week, when I was telling her about my life at 14, she suddenly interrupted me and said “Actually, Misha, why wouldn’t you write about that on your blog? Ask Mila, maybe she will let you”. And I was so excited, yay, that’s a great idea!
So, tell me, pets and peeps, would you like to hear about my human life? Let me know, and Mila says we could start a Friday series on that. It’ll be completely spontaneous, not exactly how I would love to live had I been born human, but just what comes to my mind, good and bad things. But Zofijka says she doesn’t want me to write about when I was very little, until 5, because she wants that to be just for her, so I’ll start from when I was six, it’ll be a little bit like diary entries, or something similar.
All the pets out there, what would you like to do with your lives if you were humans? Mishpurrs. :3
Misha

Winter is coming and I’m happy, but they say I’m not normal.

Hhrrru? ๐Ÿ˜ป

It’s Misha. I haven’t posted for a while because my life was very boring and I didn’t know what to post about. How are you pets and peeps doing?

I feel that the winter is slowly coming to us, and I’m happy about it. I’m getting more sleepy and there are more cosy and warm places around to sleep in. The radiators are so warm. My favourite one is in the living room, it has a space for me to lay on it, and there is a basket just for me. I also like snow. I think it will be a while before it comes but I really like looking at it. Zofijka even let me out for a little while a few days ago, but on the leash. I hate that, I’d like to be able to go where I want. She let me walk around the backyard, and I was so extremely happy to see the sun, and smell the fresh air, that I just fell on the ground with joy and rolled around in ecstasy, wanting to make my whole fur smell like the air outside. Zofijka was looking at me as if I was crazy but she doesn’t understand anything. Then she wanted to take me back home, but I didn’t want to go. I wanted to run away, and I almost did, but she caught me and yelled at me that I’m not normal. I would like to know why. Is it not normal for a cat to want to be out and about? It’s not normal (and selfish) when a human is unable to understand such a basic need. I think it’s not normal that they keep me in literally ALL the time, except for those short walks maybe once a month or even less often.

Do you think it’s not normal that I want to be out? Do you like to spend time out in nature, does it bring you pleasure? For me, it makes me euphoric!

Mishpurrs.

Misha ๐Ÿ’œ ๐Ÿ’š ๐Ÿ’™

What a great, great pity! ๐Ÿ˜ž

Hhrrru? ๐Ÿ˜ป

This is MishMish. I just woke up. I slept for most of the day. Guess what? Mila’s got me very yummy sausages, and I can have one every day! Just one… ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Isn’t it a shame? But I am glad anyway that at least I can have one sausage, they are very yummy and smell heavenly, but the peeps say they are super smelly, as if there was something very poisonous in them. I don’t believe it. I think they exaggerate as always. For them everything is smelly. Even me, sometimes. Zofijka says I have bad breath! How dare she?! Mila says that Zofijka shouldn’t say that I have bad breath because it’s not my fault but theirs, because they should care for my dental hygiene more. But even I don’t care about it and to be honest I really dislike that weird stuff they put on my teeth when they do that, and that I have to sit still and they put their big peep claws in my mouth. I always do a big drama of it. And it pays off as you can see because then they don’t want to do it anymore. But it’s also awful of them because it’s like they don’t even care if I get gum disease or something like that and die! Or my teeth fall out and I’ll starve myself to death! Russian blue cats get gum disease easily, but noo, my peeps are too lazy to care. And then when my gums will start to rot, they will be all acting innocent and like: “Oh, poor Misha, we wonder why his gums are so bad, and why he is so smelly!” as if they had nothing to do with it. But that’s of course humans for ya…

But I didn’t want to rant about that. I wanted to rant about something else. Also closely peep related. I overheard a conversation Mum had with Mila and Zofija in the morning. She said: “I’ve got an idea. I think it’ll be worth trying to finally make some space for Misha to go out on the terrace, so that he won’t run away. I think I’ll do it today”. As you can imagine if you know me, and hopefully you do by now, my heart skipped with joy. Yayyy, yaaaay! I will go out. I will play in the sun. I will look at the big world! I will catch magpies and seagulls and give them to my peeps and eat them every day for dinner – the magpies and seagulls, not the peeps! – They will see how brave and strong I am, and not as they say – “That clumsy Misha can’t even catch a half-dead fly.”! – Mum went out somewhere, I thought in preparation to make a “space” for me, and, full of happy, fuzzy feelings, I went to sleep. I slept for a long time. I woke up at dinner time and looked around to see how’s Mum’s work going. There were no signs of progress, though. Any progress. None at all. Peeps are stupid. And then I went downstairs and found Mum vegging out on the couch in the living room, in front of the telly. What the f…feline?! And then I overheard another lovely peep convo. “So what’s with that run for Misha?” “Ah, no, I thought it through” – said Mum – “and I don’t think it’s worth the effort. I’d have to climb the ladder and I think I’m too afraid to do that”. Like, what? What’s so scary about climbing the ladder? Climbing anything really? Climbing’s so, so much fun. I wonder why the peeps – who are so cocky that they are smart and know waaay more than me –
haven’t discovered the joys of climbing yet. “And other than that” – Mum continued – “what if I’d do it, and make it for him, and he’d be bored after a couple of days, as he often is? My effort will be even more worthless. And I just don’t feel in the mood” Me? Seriously, me?! I may get quickly bored by boring things, but I will never, ever, in a million years, get bored of the outside. It’s just so frustrating they don’t get such simple things. She isn’t in the mood… It’s not the matter of mood, for Russian blue heaven’s sake! So I went back to sleep, and, as you know, I just woke up. And I feel very sad and disappointed, still. I think I just have to get used to it and be happy with just looking through the window. Sometimes what you have just has to be enough for you and you either accept it, or continue being constantly grumpy and unhappy for the rest of your life. If it’s up to me even a little bit, I’d better try to be happy and satisfied with what I have.

How has your week been, pets and peeps? Any frustrations? Or was it a happy week for you?

Mishpurrs. ๐Ÿ’œ ๐Ÿ’š ๐Ÿ’™

Misha

How could I know?!

Hhrrru? ๐Ÿ˜ป

Misha here. Does anyone else out there like salt?… Well, as you’ve probably gathered, I do. But now I have bittersweet associations with salt. I know lots of foods are salted, but today I got to taste salt on its own. And the peeps are having a go at me because of that. I feel very hurt today because of that.

I tried to be the best Mish I could possibly be in the morning, and purr very loudly, and I was in a very good mood. Then, my peeps disappeared somewhere for hours and I was left on my own. I was very bored, and not particularly sleepy, and just wanted to do something. I could tell there was something different in the kitchen. It was on the kitchen table. I came closer to see what was different. And it was a little bowl. A bit like the ones I eat from. But the thing that was in it didn’t smell very yummy and looked kinda weird. I climbed on the table (good that my human Daddy wasn’t around) I was just so very intrigued what it is) and I dipped my paw in it. They were some weird, tiny, white grains, that felt very similar to the gravel in my loo? “Did they move my loo to the kitchen? Why? Why didn’t they tell me earlier?”, I was wondering, very surprised and a bit worried. But then I brightened up a lot. It would be actually much better to have the loo in the kitchen. I had my loo in the peeps’ bathroom and sometimes they still forget that I am here and too have physical needs from time to time and can’t open the doors because they didn’t feel like it was necessary to teach me, and they sometimes just close the door to the loo after they go out, egoists! And our kitchen is open plan, so no one can close it from me. This new loo looked just a little bit weird. They didn’t let me to jump on the tables and now they even let me poop and pee there, can you imagine this?! Yeah, it was hard to comprehend for me too… And it didn’t quite allow for much privacy, it was just a bowl, and quite a small one. Well, if they want so… It actually felt like a bit of an adventure to me, and I decided to test how it would work for me before they come home, felt like a good opportunity. I started to kneat the gravel with my paws, and the bowl turned out way too small for my needs. Well, small I might be, but I’m not that small – I thought. – The gravel started to spill out on to the table. Next time they’ll know I need something bigger.It was really hard to find a suitable place to pee in at such a small space, so I was growing a little bit impatient. I was also very intrigued about the whole thing. I liked the texture under my paws, and the nice sounds it was making. I liked this new gravel very much! Finally, feeling more and more in need of relieving myself, I pressed on the bowl with one of my paws more strongly, and suddenly it danced around on the table and everything, just everything spilled out on the table. Oh well, at least that’ll learn my peeps something about my size, I can’t do my thing in a kitten’s loo. I was a bit worried because, honestly, that didn’t really look like something my peeps would approve of, but now I needed to pee really badly. Now with all of the gravel being out, I could do it easily. Uh oh! What a mess! Mummy’s certainly not going to like it. I covered up my wee neatly, the least I could do, and jumped off quickly and went to the living room to clean myself in peace and quiet. As I went through the house, I could feel that the gravel was still on my paws and making crunching noises, and it was all over the floor. I laid on my personal pouf. I started off my cleaning routine, and when I was licking my paws, I noticed that they taste really nicely. I licked that yummy taste off. And then after I cleaned myself thoroughly I quietly fell asleep.

I could hear the peeps coming back so I already went in to the hall to welcome them and calm them down as effectively as possible before they could potentially get mad at me – something was telling me I didn’t do the right thing with that loo thing. – “Hey Misha!” – Mum called –
“Oh, you’re waiting for us, you’re so sweet!”. She came into the house and then to the kitchen, and her tone of voice changed immediately and she wasn’t nice at all anymore. She cried: “Oh no! What have you done, you idiot?!”. Ehh, I knew something was wrong, but what? So Zofijka and Mila came in to see what was going on and they were both gasping in horror and screaming.

From their chaotic talk, I learned that that “gravel” was salt! And that Mum put it on the table, but she said she’ll never do this again, because Misha is so stupid. But, I ask you, how could I know it was salt?! I don’t have much to do with salt in my life, I never cared how salt looks like. I just wanted to pee and there was such a nice place to do that, so I did! I feel so very hurt. They all say I am stupid and messy. I know well that neither of those things is true, because I am very very clever, and I am not messy at all, even they always say it –
“Misha is so clean! He never damages anything, even if he is curious! He’s so gentle and careful with everything!”. – Because I am! And now, just one incident happened, and I am suddenly stupid and messy Misha and the worst Misha in the world. They are the most malicious and self-centered creatures in the world! All humans are so grossly self-centered, they can only and always see things their way. They won’t even try to see it how I see it, because Misha is just stupid and messy. And Zofijka calls me names. She calls me an idiot, and “the salt king”, and constantly makes allusions about salt when I am around, or tells me that I should work in a salt mine and such. It’s so damn annoying. You can’t make even one mistake that they wouldn’t remind you about all the time.

Well, I think I’ll just go to sleep and hope that today will be somewhat better.

How was your day today, pets and peeps? What do you do to comfort yourselves when someone hurts you?

Mishpurrs. ๐Ÿ’œ ๐Ÿ’š ๐Ÿ’™

Sad Misha

Everyone’s coming and going, but I can’t. :(

Hhrrru? ๐Ÿ˜ป

It’s Misha and I’m sad. I like being alone, but not lonely. And in last couple of weeks I’ve been feeling lonely a lot. I so hope it will end soon, or that I will be able to have some adventures too. The peeps are having them all the time! Everyone’s coming and going somewhere all the time. Last week, I haven’t seen Zofijka almost at all. And then suddenly everyone was gone, I only saw Olek a few times and he gave me some food, but only very little, not as much as Mum or Mila gives me, I guess he doesn’t know how much I eat. I was so terribly bored. Then they came back – that is Mum, Dad and Mila – and were very happy to see me but the next day when I woke up Mum and Dad weren’t there again, so I guess it was just pretended. I hate lying people. I never lie! It’s only people that do it, and that’s why, while I love my peeps, I also think humans are the worst and strangest species in the world. I wish they were felines like me, at least they wouldn’t be so cocky all the time. But I was a brave Misha and I didn’t cry, and at least then Mila was with me so I spent a lot of time with her, and I had a lot of treats. But I felt very sad and a bit rejected anyway, because they could go anywhere they wanted and I can’t even leave the house for a minute because then there’s one big drama. The next day Zofijka came, but this week still they are almost constantly out of the house. I guess that’s what they call holidays. So why can’t I have my holidays too? I really hope those holidays will end soon, or that they will take me at least on the terrace so I can smell the fresh air. I love the smell of fresh air, do you? And I love the smell of flowers. I only dislike the smell of other cats, and sometimes I can feel it when they do let me out for a little while.

Have you been on holidays, pets and peeps? Or if you pets aren’t going anywhere like me, how do you deal with it? Are you sad about it or is it normal for you and you don’t care, or perhaps you even like it this way? What do you do when your peeps leave you?

It’s so very sunny today, I would really like to go out. Maybe if I’ll go for a walk around the house and cry long enough at ever window I’ll piss them off enough to let me out. Mum and Dad have just come back from wherever they were. I’ve heard that even Jocky decided to go on holidays and ran away. (sigh) The world is so unfair! Just wait until the Feline Era comes!

Mishpurrs. ๐Ÿ™‚

Misha ๐Ÿ’œ ๐Ÿ’š ๐Ÿ’™

A day of sleep.

Hhrrru? ๐Ÿ˜ป

How are you pets and peeps doing? ๐Ÿ™‚ Did you sleep well last night, whenever it was for you? I did, very well. I slept on Mila’s bed. I was very tired before going to sleep, I played a lot with a rubber band, running with it around the house and playing with peeps. I slept for many hours and woke up when already some of the peeps were up and having their breakfast. I had mine too. But I didn’t eat much today. I haven’t been feeling too well recently. That’s of course not a reason for me not to eat, but it is for my peeps. They’ve been very worried because I get sick a lot and throw up almost everything that I eat, even my Mish food and chicken breasts. But what can I do about it? It’s not my fault I guess, is it? SO why do they punish me for this?! They give me very little food and say that there are no treats at all, so I am wondering whether it’s true and they’re too lazy to drag all of their four legs out of the house and get me some or if they just don’t want to give them to me. Really, I should think about learning how to open the cupboards years ago, then I would know what the truth is, but I’m afraid I’m too old to master it now. But I also didn’t eat much today for another reason as well. It’s been a quiet day and all the peeps have been out for a large part of the day, so I just slept it through. It was very pleasant. I had so many beautiful dreams, with lots of chicken breasts, and Mish snacks, cans of tuna, Mish ice cream, kefir and all, everything smelled so heavenly! Just shows how obsessed with food I am, but I’m too obsessed to even care, I love my obsession, especially that, so far, it doesn’t even make me fat. And just dreaming of food will never make you fat, so that’s even better. I love such long, quiet days, when I can just go to sleep somewhere and sleep through long hours, just waking up for a second once in a long while to stretch or turn to the other side. Wonder what I’m gonna do at night, but if it’ll be boring and not much interesting food in sight, I can always go back to sleep.

So, how did you sleep last night? Any cool dreams? Let me know. ๐Ÿ™‚

Misha ๐Ÿ’œ ๐Ÿ’š ๐Ÿ’™