They finally got it.

Hhrrru? 😻

Misha here. Guess what? My sluggish peeps are starting to think. After 3 years of me living with them. How do I know that? Because they’ve JUST started to come to terms with the fact that I understand more than tey think I do. What a truly shocking discovery, isn’t it?!

One evening I was doing my own business and suddenly heard Mila calling me. I could hear her well and was actually quite close to her but chose to ignore her until I’ll find out that it’s worth my effort to come to her. So she went to Mum’s room and asked Mum if I was there. Mum told her where I was and Mila was calling me all the time so I knew it was something big. And Mum also called me mish mish mish so I didn’t know where to go, but finally followed Mila as she was going downstairs and it looked like she wanted to show me something and I grew more and more interested. And Mum was like: “Wow, he understands that you call him, and where you want him to go!”. Like, wow, really, do I? Wasn’t that quite obvious? No one else in this house is called “mish mish mish”, and if she was going downstairs, obviously she wanted me to follow her and not go in the opposite direction, right? It’s disgracing that they think I am such a total blockhead! And then at the end of the stairs I could feel what was the reason for Mila calling me, I felt a very nice smell from the kitchen, it was yummy yummy fish. I love eating fish. And Dad was having some for supper and was keen to share with me. It was so so yummy. As I ate, I could hear Mila coming back to Mum’s and saying: “He probably understands even more than just that, far more than we realise”. What a spectacular discovery! My peeps are learning new things! Yay for the human race! 😻 No I am not sarcastic at all, I don’t even know how to be sarcastic, I am just a poor kitty who doesn’t even know what they want from me and the only word I understand inhuman language is “Miiiiishaaaaaaaa!!!”. I am 3 years old but have no wits and need to be treated like a 3-month-old baby, because I am just so helpless and feeble-minded, wonder how they’d even managed to toilet train me hahahaha.

But OK, let’s be serious. Of course I understand more than they think I do. I maybe don’t get all of their stupid things because I’m not into that and don’t care, but if something is about me, you can be sure I understand. I tell you that though only because you don’t live under the same roof as me, because – as many other cats probably do too – I find that pretending to be silly and ignoring what’s going on around can really pay off at times and it actually shows how clever you are because making a choice whether you want to hide something or let others know about it also requires some thinking and decision making skills, if not anything else. And they can’t blame me because they do just the same! Even today, I came to Mila’s room, and she picked me up (even though she certainly knows I hate it, but OK, sometimes you have to compromise), and then put me to sleep, but I got up again and stood on her knees and looked very emphatically at the drawer where she keeps my treats, and wagged my tail in its direction so that she could know what I mean. And I know that she got it, but didn’t do anything, just stroking me as if she didn’t notice anything, while I was starving! It’s the same with all of them, so they can’t blame me.

Do you, other pets out there, also prefer not to disclose how much you actually understand? And you peeps out there? Be honest! Honesty is so rare in this world.

Mishpurrs.

Misha 💙 💚 💜

Advertisements

I want out.

Hhrrru? 😻

It’s me Misha. I’m in a very agitated and adventurous mood recently. Because I can feel spring in the air. My peeps were so silly and thought that I don’t think about it anymore, but I do, I can feel the sun when I sit on the windowsill, I can hear seagulls calling me and laughing at me that I can’t be out as they can (I never liked seagulls, they’re so stupid and shouty). And Jocky is outside, he can play and do whatever he wants but I can’t. It’s not fair, is it? But no one understands me. I would like to be out and have some nice adventures, catch something and show them stupid peeps how clever I am, or go somewhere that I’ve never been yet.

Mum is constantly saying that I need to be patient and that soon there will be net on the terrace and then I can be there and sunbathe how much I want, even all days. But I don’t want the net. I don’t want to just “sunbathe”. I want to climb up out on the roof, or go to the garden, and when they’ll put the net in there I won’t be able to do that. And there are no nice things to observe. No birds are flying there, no nice views. It’s boring. I’m not a fricken old guy who will just sit in the sun, I’m an up and doing kinda guy. Well OK, I do like the sun, and my sleep, and lazing around, but winter’s for it, not spring. They are so ignorant and think that everyone is just like them.

I thiNK I am a frustrated Misha today.

Oh but I have a good news for you today too. A few days ago I’ve got a lovely present from my Daddy. I really like my human Daddy, when he comes near me, I always throw myself to the floor and want him to stroke me. He strokes me so strongly, not so delicately like Mum or Mila or Zofijka. He strokes me all over my spine and it’s so pleasant that I don’t know what to do, it’s so pleasant that it’s unpleasant, or maybe the other way around, I don’t know, my mind goes crazy, but nicely crazy, as when I feel the catnip, it’s the same kinda feeling. But Daddy likes me only a bit, so that’s why I like him even more. I don’t like it when someone is too nice for me and likes me too much and wants something from me all the time. I’d rather someone be a bit unpleasant to me than too nice. And Daddy often likes to pretend that he doesn’t see me, and when he does see me, it’s only when I want him to stroke me, or when I am behaving badly, like jumping on the table for example or constantly begging him for food or when my poop is too smelly or something. So he almost constantly nags at me, but I don’t care, he’s just like this, if he wouldn’t be grumpy he wouldn’t be alive. But sometimes, Daddy also makes me very nice presents. Usually because Mum wants him to. Like he made the scratchboard for me, and a couple other things.

But this present that I’ve got from him now, I got from him because he wanted it, not Mummy. It’s a beautiful cartboard box. It has sort of dimples in it, because it’s an apple box. But now it’s a Misha box. I love lying in there, it makes me so happy. I love to rub myself at those dimples, I really like this box. I always go there when I feel sad that I can’t go out and I feel so nice there. It’s my favourite place of the year I think. It stinks that Daddy’s away now, he’s been away for almost the whole week, so most of the time I’m the only man in the household, as Olek is at work too. I’m glad that I got this nice present from Daddy.

And when will they bring me flowers? Misha’s ponderings on his gender identity, dietary preferences and having hope in humanity.

Hhrrru? 😻

Misha here, if you haven’t figured it out yet. Today is International Women’s Day so I’d like to wish all of you women out there a very happy day. Well it’s ending here, but I just hope it was happy for you. Zofijka says that on 10th March men have their special day and then September 30th is for boys to celebrate. And that presented me with a very serious dilemma… Who am I? Am I a man or a boy? I think I am a man, because I am strong, can catch and kill flies and spiders and all the meat you know so that the women won’t panic, I’m their hero, they say I’m handsome and Mila and Zofijka like to sleep with me. I am 3 years old which is 30 for humans. I am very intelligent and serious and brave and know a lot of things about humans that they don’t even know and even more about cats. But then they always call me “cute boy”, “little boy”, “cheeky boy” and so on and so forth as to suggest that I am a child, a boy. Only a boy. They say how small I am, make all the decisions for me and treat me like a baby. Sometimes I like it, because I get all I want and they like me so much because I’m so cute, I can pulate people to get what I want, they say I am a real pulator because I don’t say anything yet everyone is doing what I want them to do, and that’s apparently pulative. Or however they call it. but sometimes it drives me crazy though when they treat me like a baby, and I hate being so small sometimes. Then there are people who think I am a girl: “Oh God, isn’t she such a lovely kitty?!”. Why does everyone think Misha is a girl’s name only when it’s originally for guys? Well Mila says so but I believe her. I hate being called “she”, I am not a Michelle! My peeps hate it too though so they always defend me. I remember that when I went to the vet and they removed my bits the vet said jokingly to Zofijka: “So now, your cat is no longer a he, it’s an it”. I was mad at him. But luckily my peeps don’t think so, that wasn’t funny at all, I’m not a thing. If I were feeling better then, I would scratch him, but I was too dizzy and wobbly. Luckily I didn’t have to see him again.

Can I be both a man and a boy or do I have to choose one? Or can I choose anything at all? Or maybe it’s just all up to me who I want to be, I just need to pulate others to believe it too? Maybe it’s only reserved for humans and I have to be just a cat. But being a man or a woman must be so fun, you can have another special day for yourself. While I have only two, my birthday and World Cat Day. When is World Human day, by the way, does anyone know? And there’s yet another aspect of those men’s and women’s days. You get flowers! Well, at least women seem to do. I guess men don’t like flowers for some reason, which is a shame, because they smell so nice and you can bite in them, in their leaves, or pick them, and it’s so much fun, I love it. They probably just don’t know what’s really good. I love flowers though, so, it’s so unfair that I don’t get them! I’ve never got flowers! From anyone! Even a single, tiniest flower! It’s so sad. i live in this world for three years and they’ve never found a good enough occasion to give me a flower. Moreover,if someone gets them, they are jealous! I come close to relish the smell, the fresh taste of leaves, or the earthy taste of the water in the flowerpot, and they shout at me: “misha! Go away from there! It’s not for you! Are you a herbivore or what?!”. So what if I am? They can eat anything, even some awfully smelling, greasy stuff that they call fries that makes the whole kitchen more smelly than my litter box, and no one tells them off. And they tell me off just because they think I should eat meat. I tell you, they’re just jealous about their flowers. I bet that when I can’t see they do the same and bite into them, just don’t want to share with me! But if they got me my own flowers, there won’t be any problem. I’d have my own flowers and wouldn’t share with them, and they’d have their own and I wouldn’t care, there would be peace. Even if I broke my pot, it would be mine so they wouldn’t have to care. The bad thing is that when I sometimes get too absorbed with flowers and eat too much of this delicacy when no one sees I get sick, but, to me, that’s a very small price.

I am generally an optimist though, and always like to be hopeful. Dad was going out somewhere in the morning, and then I saw him coming back with bunches of flowers. My heart was jumping up high with excitement as I awaited, that, maybe this time, I’ll get my very own flowers. At least a little, very little one flower. They smelled so stunningly and sweetly, they were hyacinths. But there were none for me. There is such a Polish proverb that hope is the mother of fools, it seems to be very right. But I told myself that maybe not all is lost. After a few hours, the door bell rang. It was Mila’s and Zofijka’s uncle stopping by, and again, I could feel the smell of flowers, and my heart jumping cheerfully. I deluded myself that because Mum and Zofijka were out, maybe one bunch of these tulips will be for me. But nope. Not happening. Stupid jerks. And as if it wasn’t enough, Olek came back from work a few hours ago with roses. I didn’t know that, I was sleeping deeply when he came, dreaming about pots full of hyacinths and tulips and fresh water and a kind human being encouraging me: “Misha, don’t be so shy, it’s for you, why won’t you take a sip of water to see how it tastes?”. After I woke up, I went to Mila’s room and saw that she had a pot with roses on her desk. I came closer very gently not wanting to knock them over, and Mila shouted at me that I’m a very naughty and stupid Misha and should stop sniffing all the flowers in the house like a freak, and took me away from them.

So, I guess I should give up all my hope. But, I am hopeful, that maybe on the 10th, maybe, just maybe, I’ll wake up to see a bunch of flowers only for me Misha.

Best Mishes to all of you lovely pets and peeps.

Misha. 💜 💙 💚

Misha.

Hhrrru? 😻

I’m sorry I haven’t posted for so long. I’ve been very sleepy and lethargic recently. Today I mostly slept too. I have so many places to sleep in that I can barely decide where to sleep next. But I wanted to share one thing with you. It was my birthday last week! My 3rd birthday! So I’m now about 30 for human standards. But my peeps still treat me like a baby. And I still have very mixed feelings about it. It’s funny and nice, but I’d like if they were a little bit more serious with me, I’m not a kid anymore, so what that I’m small. I got lots of treats for my birthday, and lots of sleep too. And it was a very nice, calm and cosy day, just as I like it. But earlier this week, my peeps were very forgetful. They were constantly forgetting to buy me new treats, as there weren’t any anymore, and I even had just a little of my usual food, and they were constantly forgetting to buy it for me. I did have some chicken and a little bit of fish, but I felt a bit hurt that they didn’t remember about my food. THeirs is always important, but Misha doesn’t have to eat. It looked as if that was what they thought. Even Mila didn’t have anything for me, even though I was going everywhere behind her and meowing and constantly asking Mum for treats. Finally yesterday Mummy went shopping and bought me my usual food, and lots and lots and lots of treats. Some very crispy ones and my favourite sausages. I can do anything for those sausages, I’ll even sing if you wish just to get my sausage. They are sooo yummy. And guess what? I even got another bowl. So far I’ve had very nice, porcelain bowls, as for the king, three in the kitchen to eat my meals and snacks and drink water from and one at Mila’s. But now I also have a little plastic bowl with a cat’s head on it. I really like it. It already smells with me and my food. Ain’t I really lucky? I’ve already forgiven the peeps their forgetfulness.

And how are you, peeps and pets, doing? 😍 Did you miss me? Have you also got anything special?

Mishpurrs. :3

Mishka 💜

Winter is coming. Zzzzzzzz… 😴

Hhrrru? 💙

It’s me Misha. (yawn) 😪 How are you peeps and pets doing? I am not doing much lately. Just sleeping a lot. I’m very sleepy. It’s sunny today, but no crows, no magpies, nothing, so I’m very sleepy, I don’t have to be stressed out about anything, except for Zofijka. But Zofijka says everyone needs a little bit of adrenalin because otherwise life is boring. Maybe she’s right. I don’t really know what to write about, because not much has been happening recently, and because I am very sleepy at the moment and don’t feel like thinking too much. The peeps say I’m very cuddly and social recently. ‘Cause indeed I feel more like socialising and purring and snuggling up and stuff. Maybe it’s that finally I don’t have to worry too much about such babies like Sasha, and maybe it’s the time of year, or I’m just getting old. I don’t mind being stroked or even forced to stay in bed with Zofijka as much as I did in the past. I’m so sleepy. I’m going to sleep right now, and that’s what I suggest you all do.

Mishpurrs. 🤗

Misha Pisha Shmisha Qisha Fisha 💜 😻