Welcome to My Inner MishMash! 😍
First of all, thank you for visiting. It’s a pure pleasure for me to see you here, whoever you are, because if you are here, it surely is for a reason and if so, it’s highly likely that we have at least one thing in common. Who doesn’t like to meet like-minded people, right? 😉 Also I appreciate that you are so inquiring and decided to get to know me a bit.
My name is Emilia, but you can also call me Bibiel or Bibielle, I like all of these, Bibiel is like my nickname. Sometimes on this blog, you will see me referring to myself this way, in third person, as in: “Bibielle thinks…” or something like that. Or even Bibielz, as if it was plural, even though there is only one Bibiel writing this blog, but it’s just fun. Consider it a quirky form of expressing myself, a morbid or childish thing, or something cute – it’s up to you, that’s just what feels right to me at times, especially when I feel particularly excited about something. –
I am a Polish girl in my late twenties, with a whole lot of quirks, fascinations, ideas, fears, dreams and thoughts. I am an introvert and an (overly) proud and doting cat mummy. My sweet baby is called Misha, comes from the breed of the Russian Blue which originates in Arkhangelsk, that’s why his family is called “Archangelic cats” and Misha is undoubtedly my personal guardian archangel. He’ll be seven on 30th January, but I am in total denial of his adulthood which he seems to be OK with, most of the time. So Misha is my best friend and my everything, depending on the occasion and situation.
I am also a Christian (Roman Catholic more exactly) and my faith is an important part of my life. I’ve felt drawn to traditional Catholicism and traditional Latin Mass (also called Tridentine Mass) for a couple years, but in 2021 me and most of my family have started to attend such Masses exclusively and try to stick to the tradition consequently where faith is concerned. In terms of general worldview I like to call myself an open-minded traditionalist and identify as conservative. I am also a daughter, sister, happily single, escapist, defensive pessimist, linguaphile, Celtic harp lover, synaesthete, maniacal kefir drinker, semi-hermit, gem stones collector, a so-called name nerd, equestrian, something between melancholic and phlegmatic, apparently an INFJ if it matters to you though I have mixed feelings about MBTI, people watcher, apparently a good listener who does like to listen to people, and a more than keen(likely maladaptive to some extent) daydreamer and avid paracosmist.
My interests are quite diverse. I’m very much into linguistics in general, but also some languages in particular (mainly Celtic and Scandinavian. Currently I can only speak Polish, and am learning English, Swedish, Welsh and have started learning Norwegian in 2021, though I don’t really feel like I’m learning the latter in a serious way because it’s so similar to Swedish. And I love all of them, but I would also like to learn all the other languages I love which are: Finnish, Sami, Dutch, Frisian, Faroese, Scots, Irish, Scottish Gaelic, Manx and Cornish. I have, as you can see, a huge interest in minority languages and contributing to preserve them, even with languages I don’t love as passionately as the ones I listed above, I’m always saddened to hear about them dying or being endangered. I hope that with time I’ll be able to publish posts in other of “my” languages. I love playing with words and use them sometimes not in very obvious ways. I like to think about myself, that, at least in Polish, I have quite a characteristic and quirky writing style. In other languages I think I’m still not that very experienced a writer, and therefore not as much expressive, but in Polish I love to for example mix colloquialisms, words from dialects or even swearwords at times with very beautiful or even a bit archaic language. Just love mixing styles. I really really love to develop in this area and always jump on any chance to do so, so hope that I’m going to develop my English through blogging. Feel free to let me know if you’ll see any mistakes on here or will have any linguistic suggestions. I won’t be offended if you’ll correct me and won’t bite, I promise, quite the opposite, will be very grateful for any linguistic suggestions as I love to develop in this field! 😀 I’m always happy to chat about linguistic stuff.
Also I am into given names, their meanings, origins, popularity across the world, baby name trends, I love baby name games or helping other people name their babies and come up with ideas that they might not come up with on their own but might like. I am also into such a controversial thing as how our names can potentially shape our personalities…
My other interests include human brain, medicine, psychology, mental health and disability-related stuff, Celtic and Scandinavian folklore… well, actually everything Celtic and Nordic, as well as folklore in general, so I love myths, legends and fairytales. I am a keen rider and usually horse ride once a week.
I have quite a big collection of gem stones, both precious and semi-precious, they’re also my big big passion.
If I’m not forced to attend some family gathering or am not in bed with a migraine, then most probably you can catch me reading or writing (something as lengthy as it is only possible), being online, talking to Misha in whatever language I feel is right at the moment because he seems to be able to understand all the languages of the world (or just to myself, cuz why not), listening to music (mainly folk, but definitely not only, I believe my music taste is actually quite eclectic but picky at the same time if that makes sense, and some of other genres that I tend to like are rock, indie, some good pop, lately also some early music, but I don’t limit myself to only those things), doing something with my languages or out in the forest horse riding.
I am blind since birth and also struggle with some other things like balance and coordination difficulties, which are not very severe but do affect my daily life, along with mental illnesses, which I’m going to write a little more about because I would like to be open about it on my blog and I often write about things in my life in the context of my mental health, because expressing my emotions is much easier for me through writing than any other way, and I want this blog to be a therapeutic outlet for me in a way. I’ve had recurrent major depressive episodes since I was 9, I was depressed already some time before, but that’s when I got diagnosed with depression for the first time, then with reactive depression when I was 17 and out of the boarding school for the blind, where I was since the age of 5 and while I learned there a lot, as you generally should at school, emotionally it definitely wasn’t a good experience for me. I was quite neurotic as a kid. I struggle with anxiety – generalised anxiety, social anxiety and some more specific phobias, – and in March 2018 have been diagnosed with AVPD (stands for avoidant personality disorder) and dysthymia which, for the uninitiated, is like a milder form of depression but one that clings on to your brain with a lot more determination than major depression usually does so it’s more difficult to get rid of (oh yeah, and you can still get major depression on top of that). I’d been in therapy for years, but I quit seeing my last therapist in December 2019 and now am no longer in therapy, mostly because it didn’t really help me all that much and it’s tricky when you aren’t independent when it comes to transportation and I don’t want to be a burden on my Mum with that.
OK, that’s all about me for now.
You can click the links below to find out more
learn about what I mean when I use the word
on my blog, have a listen to my
on Spotify or
if you need the password to protected posts or have anything you’d like to tell me in private, any suggestions etc. or are naming a baby and would like someone objective and uninvolved to help out (I’m always more than happy to do that, baby names are fun).
I wish you a really nice time in my Mishmashy world.
Thanks for reading and congrats if you were patient enough to reach the end. 😀