Effy Simon – “Stockholm”.

   Hey people! 🙂 

   I’ve shared on here at least one song about Stockholm already, and today I thought I’d share another one, because it’s a cool city and there are a lot of cool songs about it. This one comes from a singer who, as far as I’m aware is not from Stockholm herself, but from Malmö in Sweden, or perhaps that’s just where she’s based now. As a name nerd, I was kind of intrigued by her name – Effy – because Effy is usually a nickname of Euphemia/Eufemia, and I’m a huge fan of this name, so I wondered if she could be an Eufemia, which would be super neat especially that I don’t think it’s a very common name in Sweden at all, I guess it just isn’t common anywhere. 😀 But, interestingly, her full name is Fanny Maria Hilma Malmborg Simonsson. Yes, Fanny is a common  name in Sweden and it does not have any vulgar connotations there. It was one of her non-Swedish friends who started calling her Effy, and over time she started identifying with it and decided to use it as her stage name. Very rightly so, I think, given that she spends a lot of time in the UK from what I read and wants to go beyond just Swedish music scene, because at least from what I’ve noticed, a lot of people in the Anglosphere have a hard time understanding that something that means something bad or weird or funny in English could coincidentally be a perfectly acceptable, normal, even common name in another language, or perhaps not so much understanding but getting over it. I think Effy is a cute name. Anyways, going back to the song, I’ve come across it relatively recently and I liked it, as I did other Effy’s songs, so I’ll definitely be keeping an eye on her musical activity. 

Question of the day.

   When you talk to yourself, who is the real you? The speaker or the listener? 

   My answer: 

   Aint that an interesting and weird question? 😀 Will have to ask my Mum that when she comes back from her trip. I think for me it kind of depends. Mostly it’s so that I have several different ways in which I talk to myself, or even how my inner monologue goes. For example, if I’m criticising myself or being kind of harsh with myself, be it out loud or in my brain, I’d say the real me is the listener. Similarly if I’m telling myself what to do or not to do, motivate myself, comfort myself etc. the real me is the listener. The more that, as far as thinking is concerned, I often actually hear these thoughts in other people’s voices. Be it real people or people/beings who exist in any of my brainworlds. In other situations, when my self-talk isn’t quite as directly to myself but more neutral or just, as my Mum calls it, “spilling my thoughts out” I am the speaker. Sometimes I feel that the speaker is what I call Bibiel, and the rather disengaged listener is what I refer to as “I” as opposed to Bibiel when talking to people, but I wouldn’t really say that the “I” is any realer me than than Bibiel, nor is Bibiel any realer or authentic me than the “I”. Not sure if it even makes sense to people, but that’s more or less how it feels. 😀 

   How about you? If you don’t talk to yourself, feel free to apply this question to the way you think. 

Plu – “Sgwennaf Lythyr” (I Will Write a Letter).

   Hey people! 🙂 

   Today let’s listen to a song by Plu, the alt-folk trio from North Wales consisting of siblings Elan, Marged and Gwilym Rhys. This song comes from their self-titled album and here’s a live version of it. 

Gwenan Gibbard – “Deryn Du” (Blackbird).

   Hey guys! 🙂 

   Today I want to share with you all a traditional tune sung by Gwenan Gibbard, an artist whose music I’ve shared on here regularly both as a harpist and singer. It comes from her album Y Gwenith Gwynnaf (The Whitest Wheat). 

Enya – “Marble Halls”.

   Hi people! 🙂 

   Let’s listen to ENya today. This song is one of only two songs in her whole discography which aren’t her original songs. The other one is a hymn called How Can I Keep From Singing. This one is an operatic song actually, which is why Enya said in one radio interview that it was quite a challenge for her. It was written by Irish composer Michael William Balfe for his opera The Bohemian Girl. This song is also known as The Dream. It is both Enya’s and her mum’s favourite. 

Question of the day.

   What would you do if you had a clone? 

   My answer: 

   Hm, that would depend on a lot of things. Like, would that clone actually be willing to cooperate somehow? I mean would their sole purpose be being my clone, thus enabling me to take advantage of the fact that I have a clone, or would they be a totally independent individual who just happens to be my clone. I suppose the former makes more sense though, because otherwise why would there be a clone of me. And just think how confusing it would be to people who would happen to know both of us. Plus I’ve no idea if that’s actually true, but I once heard that a human clone wouldn’t actually be able to think and act like a proper human but would be more like an extremely good AI or something. They wouldn’t have a soul, and probably no well-developed conscience either, for that matter, so perhaps that’s why. So I am going to assume that if I had a clone, it would be more like just for the fun of it and potential benefits of it for me. Not that I’d actually want that, even if it was aethical. I’d much rather have a clone of Misha after he dies. The only purpose for a clone of myself that I’d see is that I could send her to do all sorts of peopling, or other such, at least if she could also convincingly act like me and not just look exactly like me. Other than that, I don’t really have any ideas what I could do. 

   How about you? 🙂 

Catrin Finch ft. Seckou Keita – “Tabadabang”.

   Hiya people! 🙂 

   Today I also have for you a piece that features harp and that comes from an album released this year, in May more exactly. This is an album by Welsh harpist Catrin Finch and Senegalese kora player Seckou Keita, and it is called Echo. The duo has collaborated for uite some time now, releasing several albums and winning awards together, and I’ve already shared several of their earlier pieces on here. This one is actually a lyrical song. From what I’ve read, it was written by Seckou, and is about childhood, or more exactly the experience of family, adventures and innocence during childhood. 

Ruth Keggin ft. Rachel Hair – “Mish as y Keayn” (Myself and the Sea).

   Hey people! 🙂 

   So today it’s finally time for me to share that song by Ruth Keggin and Rachel Hair that I was talking about in this post that it contains the word mish which so far is my favourite word in the Manx language because it looks almost like Misha, although I’m not really familiar with many Manx words at all. It comes from their collaborative album called Lossan (Light), which as I’ve already mentioned I really love because this album has been my closest encounter with Manx music and language so far, and I love how prominent the harp obviously is on this album, and I love Ruth Keggin’s vocals. Like the previous song by this Manx-Scottish duo that I’ve shared on here – the lullaby Arrane Saveenagh – this song also has to do with the sea. It is originally a poem written by Manx poet Annie Kissack. And as you can see from the title of this post, its title translates to Myself and the Sea from what I’ve read, which means that now I already know what mish exactly means in Manx, as I thought it means “I” but it seems to mean myself. 

Question of the day.

   What’s your favourite thing you own and why? 

   My answer: 

   It’s so difficult to choose just one thing! In line with today’s song of the day post, I could technically say Misha, because I do own Misha, but it feels a little weird to say it like that and call Misha a thing (I mean I often do, and I often say he’s my favourite thing in the world and stuff like that but usually when I call him a thing it’s kind of teasing, like when he lies of the floor and I walk past him I’ll touch him with my foot and be something like: “Whose is this thing here? I think it should be put in the bin, who needs a useless ball of fur”, and then I scoop him up and kiss him or something). So other than Misha, hmmm… At this time of year, when we’re having 27 C (which Siri claims is 80 F) I’m inclined to say my air conditioner. I finally got my new accessible controller for it just a while ago though I haven’t set it up yet so I’m curious how it’ll go. Anyway, yeah, AC makes life so much better and I often wonder why more people in the colder but not actually really super cold bits of the world don’t have it because it makes all the more sense to have AC in your house for the rare occasion when you do get a heatwave because your system isn’t used to handling it. But there are things that I own that I definitely have more of a connection to than the AC. I love my whole gem stone collection but I’m not sure if I have one single favourite stone, I like different ones for different reasons. But currently I’m particularly fond of Melisande nn Milzie – a little amethyst that I got from my Mum for my name day this year – (I give my stones human names that I love or like, especially ones that I find unusable for children even if I were to have any for some reason, and Melisande is unusable here in Poland because it doesn’t end with an -a as girl names here normally do and doesn’t go along with Polish phonetics, and I call her Milzie because that’s what one of my pen pals calls me and since I got it for my name day I thought it would be cool if her name had some connection to mine). I absolutely love my double bed, and spend loads of time in it, and I’m so happy I can have a double bed and not share it with anyone other than Misha who, unlike a lot of other cats I’ve heard of, always takes up as little space as possible and rarely stretches out on my bed properly, and even if he did, there’d still be place for one more Bibiel there no problem, so I can toss and turn and wriggle as much as I wish. I love all my Apple devices very much (oh and by the way, I haven’t told you yet that I managed to convince my Mum to switch to iPhone and now she’s had one for a couple days already and she seems to like it a lot too, so we’re an increasingly Apple family, which drives Olek nuts as he is religiously loyal towards Samsung, and as a result he said he wouldn’t talk to Mum, and he indeed didn’t the first few days after her iPhone arrived, but that was simply because he was away in Vienna, plus obviously he was just kidding). I love my Braille-Sense and PlexTalk as well because of being able to read books on them and because the Braille-Sense makes it a lot easier for me to use the aforementioned Apple devices effectively. So, I don’t know really, I like a lot of things that I have but I don’t think I like a single one a lot more than the rest. I really think Misha is the only right answer here, after all. 

   How about you? 🙂 

Alexander Rybak – “En Katt på Min Kudde” (A Cat on My Pillow).

    Hiya people! 🙂 

   I thought that for today I’d like to share with you a really cool, cat-themed song. I don’t think we’d ever had a cat-themed song on here before, even though we had several songs that were either about or by various Mishas. I absolutely love this song for its lyrics, because it’s very relatable and it shows very well what an amazing thing it is to just be able to lay down next to a cat, daydream about everything and feel it purr and feel safe and cosy, lots better even than being someone super successful and having a breathtakingly adventurous life. 

   This song comes from Alexander’s album called Visa vid Vindens Ängar (A Song at the Wind’s Meadows), from which I have previously shared the title song and which is a collection of songs written by Swedish singer and poet Paul Matson. I have also shared several other songs by Alexander Rybak before and by looking at them you can see that he’s a very versatile singer and finds himself well in a lot of different genres and stylistics together with his violin, which is something I personally really like in musicians. Oh yeah and he’s been Sofi’s crush on and off for years. He is of Belarussian descent, but his parents emigrated to Norway shortly after his birth, so Norwegian is his native language and his Swedish on this album does sound quite Norwegian which is cool. Below is the translation of this song made by Bibielz. I’ll just add that there’s a Swedish idiom in the last verse which literally translates to “if you take the devil onto your boat, you will have to row him ashore”. The English equivalent is apparently “if you dance with the devil, you have to pay the piper”, but I thought translating it literally made more sense here because otherwise it would be rather clunky to phrase. 

  I wish I was a Tarzan
Who floats on a liana,
Who fights tigers and lions
In the jungle all day
 I wish I were a a he-man
A Top secret agent
Who gets to taste the hardest blows
Who got to know the prettiest girls
But a cat is lying on my pillow
He is lying and purring on his back
I am keeping a hand on his tummy
It is warming, I feel safe
And the kitty he is svinging and twisting
His big fluffy tail
I am thinking how sad it would be
If we both did not exist right now
I wanted to be Casa Nova
Who could do anything in sex
Ten, twelve women a night
Without the slightest complex
A guy for the porn agencies
To invest a sum in
It would be many millions
in the bank book it would be written
But a cat is lying on my pillow,
He is lying and purring on his back
I am keeping a hand on his tummy
It is warming, I feel safe
And the kitty he is svinging and twisting
His big fluffy tail
I am thinking how sad it would be
If we both did not exist right now
I am sitting alone here and humming
and write a song sometimes.
 It is this devil in my boat
That I am able to row ashore
But a cat is lying on my pillow
He is lying and purring on his back
I am keeping a hand on his tummy
It is warming, I feel safe
And the kitty he is svinging and twisting
His big fluffy tail
I am thinking how sad it would be
If we both did not exist right now

Stina Rebelius – “Luftslott” (Air Castles).

   Hiya people! 🙂 

   Let’s listen to something in Swedish this time. I thought I’d share with you this sad pop song today, from an artist who is quite new to me. Stina Rebelius, or Eva Kristin Elisabeth Rebelius, is a singer and songwriter who lives in Gothenburg. Below is my translation of her song. 

  We go home slowly and turn off all the lights
As if nothing had happened
I guess the longing will go away some day
As long as we decide not to meet again
It is something that is being destroyed
That got stuck in my body
It hurts and I want to leave
Yet I stay
Because I have waited for too long
I have killed my desire
It will be easier this way
Because I have built too many air castles
So hard to say goodbye
It will be easier this way
And thoughts of reason, is it the truth that is singeing?
See voices that are being played
Because what is the point of it all?
And suddenly all the colours are the wrong shade
It is something that is being destroyed
That got stuck in my body
It hurts and I want to leave
Yet I stay
Because I have waited for too long
I have killed my desire
It will be easier this way
Because I have built too many air castles
So hard to say goodbye
It will be easier this way
Sorry for all I’ve done
I have promised, I have believed
Too many spots on my body
Which can never be washed away
Because I have waited for too long
I have killed my desire
It will be easier this way
Because I have built too many air castles
So hard to say goodbye
It will be easier this way 

Rachel Hair Trio – “The Duke of Fife’s Welcome to Deeside”.

   Hey people! 🙂 

   After recently sharing with you al a song from Rachel Hair and Ruth Keggin’s brand new Manx album called Lossan, today I thought I’d share some other piece played by Rachel Hair, or more exactly the trio that she has established, called simply Rachel Hair Trio, who have also been previously featured on my blog. This is a traditional tune. 

Travelle – “Fake Louis V.”.

   Hiya people! 🙂 

   Today I’d like to share with you another song by the Norwegian singer, songwriter and producer Travelle, whom both my Mum and me have been liking for quite some time and a lot of whose songs I’ve already shared on here, including a couple others which he released under the name Trollguten. This one, as is very clear from the lyrics, deals with the topic of the “fake it ’til you make it” philosophy. As he explained it for one Norwegian music blog, he actually did it at some point and bought a bunch of fake designer clothes to look cooler, but didn’t actually end up using them. He claims that whether it is buying followers on Instagram, embellishing your CV with things that aren’t necessarily true about you, or lying about how many people you’ve slept with, that’s not really a stupid idea, and that’s the point of this song. While I can agree that this can be sometimes helpful, I can’t say I agree with that. I mean, as someone with AVPD, I can sure get it that people can do such things as a way not to be criticised, but despite my AVPD, I’d sort of feel like I was untrue to myself if I bought fake clothes just because I wanted to look good for other people. If I wanted that for myself, I’d rather focus on creating my own style that would reflect my personality and work for my budget, and if I really did want designer clothes, I’d do all I could to actually one day be able to afford the genuine stuff. I just couldn’t be bothered to buy fake things for the sake of other people I think, but I guess I’m in the minority here because  I’m a hermit so I don’t have to care about such things, and for most people, especially those who are actually ambitious or something, the social pressure is probably a lot stronger, I see it even with our Sofi who fakes a lot of things for her peers’ sake. Similarly with wanting to have lots of followers and stuff like that, I’m totally disinterested in it, in fact I think it’s kind of nicer to have less followers because you can actually know all these people and have more genuine contact with them than with a whole crowd of followers. That’s especially true with blogging for me, I don’t think I’d like to have a huge blog with loads of followers, because it would no longer feel so nice and cosy and stuff and would probably start to feel a bit overwhelming if I wanted to keep up with engaging with all those followers. But then I don’t use your normal social media much at all and they have a bit of a different dynamic than blogging obviously. But, despite I don’t fully agree with his point, I like how he’s honest about it like that in this song, and I’m pretty sure it must be relatable for a lot of people these days, plagued with FOMO and other such difficulties that we’re having in the world these days. 

Question of the day.

   Hey all you people! 🙂 

   What are things that are seemingly easy for others but are very hard for you? 

   My answer: 

   Oh my flip, do I really have to list all of them now? 😀 It would have to be like a whole series of posts – “Things That Other People Can Do, But Bibielz Don’t Have a Clue How, in 50 parts. – 😀 Well I think I’ll just mention a few, I’ve just had a migraine and my brain’s still a bit spacey from that so I don’t feel like writing a series, plus really who needs a whole series of all the things Bibielz can’t do. 😀 

   So yeah, the obvious thing would be peopling. I’ve no idea how people do that and know what to say when and have the right emotional reactions to things and all that and how it’s not utterly draining for them. Logically, I’d think that if they can do peopling better than me, then they should be all the more drained by it, perhaps except for people like my Sofi who really are extreme extroverts and simply love being around people and talking to anyone and stuff, but most people are somewhere in the middle I guess, so it’s weird for me that their brain batteries have so much capacity. But yeah, I’m really quite clueless about how to engage with people, and so if I want to do that well, I often ask my Mum for advice, and while she can be very helpful, it often blows her mind that someone has such weird dilemmas around peopling as I do. And no, it’s not just with some random stranger people, it’s with all people really. Which is one part of why I find it rather difficult to form closer relationships that go beyond some rather superficial level. 

   Then there’s math. Although, after a lot of fighting, particularly on my Mum’s side, I did get a certificate or whatever that would be called in English saying that I have dyscalculia, for some reason it’s generally not a thing to diagnose blind people with dyscalculia and I don’t really understand why. I mean yes, a lot of blind people struggle with math and one reason why that might be is a lack/some degree of impairment of spatial imagination due to blindness, so perhaps someone figured that all blind people must struggle with math due to this so no point to diagnose them with dyscalculia on top of that if it’s blindness that’s responsible for their math difficulties. Except I also know some congenitally blind people who are really good at math, so it’s definitely not a rule and people who are better at it can’t be classified as exceptions from the rule because it seems to be a lot of such people. Plus, if there really is such a strict correlation between blindness and math difficulties that diagnosing people with dyscalculia makes no sense, then blind people should automatically have lowered requirements on all sorts of official math exams, just like dyscalculics/acalculics do, which is not a thing. Or we need some sort of additional criteria that would help in telling which blind people need those and which do not. Anyways, even though I got that certificate, and even though I often call my math difficulties dyscalculia because it’s kinda easier especially for other folks to understand, it doesn’t really look exactly like dyscalculia I think. It’s not like I can’t do counting at all or can’t understand stuff like time and such which is common among people with dyscalculia from what I’ve been told. I have no problem counting backwards, or doing some easy math in my brain, I even know the times tables to 100, which our 15-year-old Sofi still does not despite a lot of effort on her part so she laughs at me that I’m a total math geek compared to her lol. I usually had no problem learning theoretical math stuff at school and it seemed like I was able to understand it, but still applying it in practice was always difficult for me. With more complex calculations that have a couple steps or involve larger numbers, I’ve usually no clue what operations I actually have to do to get the result I need. I have that weird problem that when I read a digit, I read it right, but at the same time think of a completely different one, and it all gets really meddled in my brain. Same when someone dictates some digits to me, be it a mathematical operation, a code or whatever else really, I’ll hear the numbers right, but often end up writing different ones, and only realise that I did when something goes wrong later on. Or when I was at school we often had to read our homework aloud, and even though a boarding school staff would often spend several hours helping me do it the evening before and I had it done well, I would still often get a bad grade from it because I would read different numbers than the ones I actually wrote. It’s quite weird. I also have a problem using a calculator, not just because I often don’t know what operations to do to get the result I need, but also again because the numbers and all the plus minus etc. Keys get mixed up in my brain. Same even about digit keys on the computer, I have to really think when typing digits, especially in a string, because I usually make some mistake in there and then have to proofread and figure out if I did indeed and where exactly. 😀 So it’s funny actually that formally my job at my Dad’s includes making bank transfers. I wonder what would happen if he actually let me do that. 😀 I don’t even do my own transfers myself, I always ask my Mum, because I’m scared I’ll do something wrong and, like, send someone 3000 dollars instead of 300. Generally shopping is always a more or less stressful thing to me. I can deal with my own PIN codes and stuff like that because God bless Braille and the fact that digits in it are based on letters. What I mean is, if you want to write numbers in Braille, you have to precede them with a number sign so that it’s clear that these are numbers and not letters, and then numbers from 1 to 9 are letters from A to I, and 0 is J. So if I have to use a PIN code or something similar, I choose words from my various languages that can be written in Braille as digits, which makes them a lot easier to remember and type in. For example the Polish word babcia (granny) changes into 212391 if preceded by the number sign in Braille. This is helpful even if I don’t type in Braille but just any other keyboard or anything because I simply have to memorise the word and then it’s no problem to know what the numbers are. I also struggle with estimating numbers, like prices and stuff like that. One annoying problem that I also had with math at school was that I could do pretty well with it if I had someone sitting next to me and telling me what to do next and generally guiding me. I’d think for myself, but they’d just sort of help me figure out what to do next. And then I would often do everything really well and people would wonder what the problem really is with me and math when there’s no problem. But, as soon as the person would disappear, I’d have no clue what to do. It was super frustrating for me when I worked with my math tutor while at the mainstream high school, and she would often give me some homework to do. So in order to not forget how to do what we’d just been doing during our lesson, I’d sit down to my homework as soon as we were finished with the lesson, except my brain no longer knew how to do it. Perhaps if she’d given me the exact same math problem that we did during the lesson, maybe I’d be able to do it on my own, with the emphasis on maybe. 😀 So I’d be confused as to which operations to do when, and something would always go wrong. Especially if I ended up mixing up some numbers in the meantime as well, and as a result I could rarely get the right result. Interestingly enough, Sofi has exactly the same problem now, and for her it’s also similar to how it’s been for me inn that it’s gotten a lot worse around fourth grade. Sofi’s actually a preemie, and my aforementioned tutor also worked with her. She specialises in working with special needs students, especially blind and deaf but also more generally, and Sofi has no diagnosed special needs, but when my Mum asked her if she could help Sofi out she was willing to do it and taught both of us. So she spent like two hours with me (because I was preparing for finals at that time as well) and an hour with Sofi and we both marvelled at how she has so much patience and joked that this is why she gets ill so often, because she really got very ill with some sinus stuff or other such every few weeks. And quite soon after she started working with Sofi she said that it seems like Sofi might have some mild learning disability due to being born prematurely and suggested that she should be evaluated or something, but Mum didn’t go deeper into that as she didn’t think it could actually be practically helpful even if she was diagnoseable with something, because Sofi doesn’t have any academic ambitions really so she doesn’t even have to do the normal high school but can go to vocation school or something like that if she wants. Indeed, Sofi now says that she would like to be a plumber, or should I say a plumbress, lol, but still I think perhaps that would have been useful for her anyway. Now Sofi has a “mainstream” tutor and she – Sofi, not the tutor – tells me that she’s really struggling with her, because the tutor seems to think that Sofi’s just lazy or stupid or something, when actually she understands everything quite well during the lessons, it’s just when she has to do something completely on her own with no guiding that she has no clue how to actually apply what she knows in practice and just writes nonsense. 

   Other than math, Bibielz also can’t do a lot of seemingly simple manual things. Like how the flip do people even tie their shoe laces?! I’d been taught that in preschool, then at school, then my Dad tried his luck and I still don’t know how to do it. It’s kinda like with math, I know in theory what you have to do in order to do it, but I still don’t know how to do it in practice anyway. Not that I care, I can just wear shoes without laces, but yeah, that’s just another thing that Bibielz can’t do and that’s a mystery for me how other peoplez do it. And a lot of other things like that, like how do people do it that they can cut their food into even pieces, well generally cut either with a knife or with scissors properly? In my blind school, we had to eat with a knife and fork, one of the staff even said that we should eat vegetables that we would eat alongside sandwiches for breakfast with a knife and fork rather than just with our fingers as I guess most normal people do, though noone actually did it, and while I can eat with a knife and fork no problem, cutting food is another thing, so someone always either had to help me do it, or do it for me. We had such subject at school which I have no idea how to translate it to English, we learned how to do artsy things there (or as Sofi says “plast plast”) but also things like cooking or sewing or such. I had great luck that pretty much all the people who went to this particular class with me also struggled with it and most were intellectually disabled, and it was a pretty small group of just four people most of the time so our teacher was able to give everyone quite a lot of attention and make sure that no one would make too much of a mess during their crafty endeavours, wouldn’t ruin a Mother’s Day card or other clay figurine for their mummy so much that it would actually show that they did it totally independently, or chop their whole finger off and mix into the salad. 😀 I was also super lucky that this teacher actually really liked me despite  my shortcomings at her subject, and as soon as she discovered that I am decent at writing, we’d made an unspoken deal that I would make up lovely little poems for various cards that my classmates were making for various occasions, or for school events or stuff like that, while she would do most of the manual labour for me, which I was super grateful for. Or whenever she would learn about any art competitions for her students to take part in that also accepted literary forms, she would encourage me to take part in them and I would work at some short stories or stuff like that during our lessons. When I came back home from that school, I mean for good, I really wanted to learn at least some basic cooking or something like that, and wanted to help my Mum make dinner, so she told me to cut up vegetables. It went fairly decent for a while, even though my vegetable pieces were in all sorts of shapes, but then at some point I cut my finger pretty badly and there was so much blood that my poor Mum got really scared, and now she’s very reluctant to let me do anything more serious in the kitchen. 😀 

   Yeah, so these are a few example things that Bibielz can’t do. 🙂 

   Now your turn. 🙂 

Enya – “Long Long Journey”.

   Hi guys! 🙂 

   Let’s listen to Enya today. I really like this song and I think it really captures the topic of coming home after a long journey really well. As someone who really likes that feeling, perhaps the most of everything about travelling and journeying, I find it very relatable. It comes from Enya’s album Amarantine. 

Question of the day.

   What’s something you have zero interest in? 

   My answer: 

   Even though I’d say I’m at least slightly interested in lots of things, or at least some aspects of them, I’m sure there are also loads of things that I’m just not into at all. One such thing that comes to my mind is sports. I mean, I like horse riding, I like to do it myself (putting my complicated relationship with it aside), I like to hear about other people’s experiences etc. But even with horse riding I’m not that madly and universally into it that I’d follow any horse riding events or watch/read about competitions and so on. With other sports, I’m totally disinterested. I never watch them, unless perhaps occasionally for more social reasons like simply because we’re just sitting with my family in the living room and the telly is on and they’re watching some sport stuff, like my Dad would usually watch football and my Mum likes to watch boxing and some other sports as well, but I’m not likely to pay much attention to that anyway. It actually strikes me as kind of peculiar that so many people here in Poland watch football so religiously even if they don’t have much of an interest in it outside of watching it, and same about ski jumping, which for some people in my Dad’s family it’s just some sacred tradition that they have to watch it, even though aside from that they don’t show any real interest in ski jumping. I’m not into doing any other sports than horse riding either, and I often find it kind of difficult to comprehend their rules, especially team sports, so this is just not something I get. 

   Other such topics would most definitely be all things automotive, which comes to my mind because my Dad, being a lorry driver, is very much interested in and has a lot of knowledge about, and some about Olek, who has also always wanted to be a long-distance driver but for now has ended up being a car mechanic with his own business. So there’s a lot of car talk in my house, which sometimes makes me thinkk that out of all the automotive-ignorant folks out there in the world, my knowledge on the topic must still be quite extensive because I just passively absorb so much stuff about it since very early childhood. 😀 There’s even a whole separate Polish TV channel ALL about cars and my Dad likes to watch it, and it’s just SO insanely boring. I like the fact that there are TV channels about such, well, still relatively niche topic I guess, but I think it’s unfair that there aren’t many more channels which would be all about a specific niche theme or at least that they are not more popular. 

   And speaking of my Dad’s and Olek’s interests, all things military as well. I’m not  a pacifist, but I thinks it’s slightly odd to have such a super strong interest in all things war (WWII specifically) as they do. Of course it’s not because they think it was good or anything, but they just find it super interesting and Olek has always dreamt that he could go to war and experience some real adventure. His view of it is definitely somewhat skewed from having been raised on stuff like the Polish TV series Four Tank-Men and a Dog, which takes place during WWII and deals with the topic in a rather light way. I’m actually surprised that he still hasn’t joined the army which he would really like but I guess my Mum would go crazy and he cares too much about her. But my Dad actually served in the army and while he never explicitly said it that way (because I don’t think he even realises it) I have a strong feeling that he got quite traumatised in there. Not quite PTSD for sure, but he saw some awful things in there and it seems to have been a difficult experience for him overall. Or perhaps I just project my own feelings on him because it sure would have been a shitty experience for me to have gone through all the things he’d gone through there. Anyway, regardless of that, he’s still very much into all things military and all things WWII. I think it’s important to have a decent historical knowledge and especially about the history of your own country, but with the strictly military stuff my thirst for historical knowledge doesn’t really go beyond that, unless it’s things like for example people’s personal stories of how they experienced war and what it was like from their individual perspective or stuff like that. 

   Oh yeah, and maths. Pretty much anything really that involves lots of counting, or counting that feels unnecessary/superfluous to my brain, or lots of numbers in general. It’s just so unappealing. I can deal with simple math if I have to and if it’s actually useful for something, but I have no interest in it and it blows my brain how some people find math-related stuff interesting, engrossing, fascinating, beautiful or whatever else. That means that all things econoomy, finance, budgeting, just money in general feel very unappealing to me as well, and if it’s about my personal finances, also super stressful and overwhelming, even simple shopping sometimes ‘cause I just have no idea about things. Same about physics, it’s super boring. And everything astronomy, space etc. I like it here on Earth and I don’t get why I’d have to think about space, the more that I can’t even see the sky so it feels super abstractive. Some biology- or even chemistry-related stuff can be interesting though. 

   So, these are things that come to my mind first. Others I’m probably so disinterested in that I can’t even think of them. 😀 

   You? 🙂 

Ruth Keggin – “Arrane Saveenagh” (Slumber Song).

   Hiya people! 🙂 

   Recently I shared with you a song by Ruth Keggin, and in that post I mentioned her brand new album recorded with the Scottish harpist Rachel Hair, the album is called Lossan (Light) and I said I’d probably be sharing something from it, namely another song with “mish” in the title. Well, I’ve had very few encounters with Manx music, so I was very excited when I found out that this album came out, , and that also there’s so much harp on it which is obviously my favourite instrument, and I’ve already listened to it several times, and I really really like it. So I decided that I’ll actually share a few songs from it rather than just one, and the one I’m sharing today isn’t the “mish” one yet. Instead, for today I decided to share with you a beautiful little lullaby sung by Ruth a capella. It was collected by Manx folklorist Mona Douglas from one Mrs. Shimmin of Foxdale. The song was apparently originally in English and then later translated to Manx, and while I don’t know what it’s lyrics are exactly and haven’t been able to find a translation, I’ve read that they’re similar to the English Rock a Bye Baby. The sea is a big part of these lyrics which makes me like this lullaby even more. 

Question of the day.

   How are you today? 

   My answer: 

   I’m definitely better than I was, say, even on Friday, but this whole week has been a bit crappy for me, mentally at least. I’ve been having loads of sensory anxiety stuff going on lately and feeling quite emotional for some unspecified reason, or perhaps actually for lots of different reasons, depending on from which angle you look at it, with self-harm urges on top of that, and now that all these things have quietened downn a little bit, mostly I’d say I’m just kind of blah. Usually Misha helps me a lot with the sensory anxiety, but now that the prozac is flushed out of his system for good, he’s become quite wired again as is typical at this time of the year, so he doesn’t really sleep in my room all that much or spend much time with me. 

   How about you? 🙂 

Emma Langford – “The Winding Way Down to Kells Bay”.

   Hey all you people! 🙂 

   I have a really lovely tune for you today that I’ve discovered fairly recently, and pretty much ever since I’ve discovered it, it’s been stuck in my brain. I don’t really mind it at all, and it has also prompted me to familiarise myself with more of Emma Langford’s music, which I really like as well. But this song is so idyllic and I think very easily likeable that I thought this one would be the best to share. It comes from her 2019 album Sowing Acorns. Each song on this album is dedicated to someone, and this one is in memory of Emma’s late grand-uncle Eamonn, who lived in Kells Bay, and who died of a heart attack while Emma and her family were visiting him one summer. Kells Bay is a fishing village in county Kerry, and the vivid picture of it that we get from listening to this song gives an impression that it must be a really nice place.