Question of the day.

I have some questions for you on the topic of childhood now. Here’s the one I picked for today. ๐Ÿ™‚

Were your parents/guardians flexible or strict?

My answer:

My parents were definitely flexible! My Dad likes to think about himself as a very strict parent, but he is only very strict with Olek, with whom he doesn’t have the best relationship so that strictness seems to come more from the place of anger and the need to control than care. As weird as it feels to admit sometimes, for me, and I think for Zofijka too, he doesn’t really have much authority. He likes to tell all of us what we have to do in his view but we never care, sometimes we’ll do it for the peace of mind. My Mum is much more of a role model and an authoritative person for me, even though she was a big softy in raising all of us and with a bit of a tendence to be overprotective. Still, she has her rules, and they were always clear to us, and sometimes she can be pretty strict, but not over the top, just for the sake of being strict and tough, but rather for the sake of being possibly fair. She’s always been most flexible with me, using the excuse that I am the most disciplined of all of us, although I don’t think of myself as a very disciplined person and I am not even sure I would like to be one, it certainly makes life easier but also awfully boring, so I think what saves me is that I have some common sense after her, rather than am somehow very disciplined or dutiful or something like that.

What was/has been your experience? ๐Ÿ™‚

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10 thoughts on “Question of the day.”

  1. A big portion of my childhood was spent in foster care. My biologic parents were a mixture of both strict and too lax. Those foster fiends were (apparently) glad to have free slave labor, so I guess they’d fall in the ‘too strict’ category.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. If you take my parents’ tendencies toward irrationality, abuse, and insanity aside, and you just look at the issue of strictness versus leniency, I’d say my dad was never strict AT ALL. My brother and I were decent children who wanted to please our parents, but when my little sister came along, she played into that like a little manipulator and learned to get away with whatever she wanted.

    My mom wasn’t strict so much as downright insane and irrational, but with rules, there really were none. It’s hard to describe, but I had no curfew, no expectations (I did my own homework without prompting with only a few exceptions, like third grade when the teacher gave us so much homework that I was overwhelmed and couldn’t cope). There were no behavior guidelines, no chores, no nothing.

    With housework, my dad simply never did any, both when my parents were still married and then after they separated/divorced. Mother, on the other hand, kept a very tidy home. But there was this one time when I was in high school or college, and my little sister and I stayed up all night to clean the kitchen and impress her. When she woke up the next morning, she entered the kitchen and said, “What do you want, a prize? You should help me clean all the time, you rotten ingrates.” (We never helped her clean again after that.)

    Liked by 1 person

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